Narrative Argument 4.2

Rebecca Moran
Professor Henderson
Academic Writing
20 March 2011

The Eyes that Screamed for Help

It was a beautiful spring day on April 22, 2001. I paced up and down my wood staircase making it creak as many times as I could, hoping my mom would get annoyed and finally come down and be ready to leave. Every weekend during the springtime, my mom would have a soccer game and I would beg her to bring me. It wasn’t because I actually enjoyed watching her games, but it was the playground that I couldn’t get enough of as a 9 year old child. There was the huge tire swing that you could twist around and let it go and enjoy the best ride of your life, the challenging red monkey bars that every kid wants to conquer, the sand between my little toes that felt so good, and that big green twisty slide, which was always more fun climbing up than it was going down. The playground was my sanctuary when I was a kid. There was nothing more I would rather do than let my imagination run wild in that place. I could spend hours and hours in a single place, but my imagination took me across the globe, to places like China. I actually thought that I could reach China through that playground sand if I dug deep enough. Who knew at that time that my favorite place on Earth would be the place that I would witness the most shocking experience of my life?

I finally got my mom out of the house and we were just about to get into the car, she stopped walking around our green aerostar van and asked, “Becca where is your jacket? You need a jacket, it’s supposed to rain.” I let out one big huff, thinking about arguing with her and telling her, “I will be fine mom,” but I realized I probably would lose that battle like always, so I sprinted and grabbed my pink and purple Pocahontas rain jacket and held it on my lap for the car ride.

When we got to the soccer fields, I spotted the playground in all of its glory. My mom wouldn’t let go of my hand until we fully crossed the street, and when she did, I ran to the swings with my friend Devin. We just loved the feeling of the wind blowing through our loose hair and feeling as though we were on top of the world. My favorite aspect of the swings was the butterflies in my stomach during the descent from the highest point. Boy, it was a rush.

We were swinging for a while, and then we jumped off the swings and took a little breather. All of a sudden, out of the corner of my eye I saw an object begin to fall. I turned and looked, and to my shock it was a big chubby boy pushing down a small framed little girl, who seemed to be much younger than him. After he grabbed her and threw her down, he kicked her in the ribs and kicked sand in her face. I had never seen anything like this before in my life. It began to rain and it seemed as though time was slowing down and the rain was falling with an unchanging beat. I froze and thought to myself, “Could this really be happening? Is this real life? What is going on?” All the sounds around me started to be muffled, then it turned into complete silence and I was in a state of total disbelief. What was I, a little girl who was smaller than the big chubby boy, supposed to do?

I began to think about the parable in the bible I heard in Sunday Bible School titled “The Good Samaritan.” It is about a man who gets beat up and robbed and left at the side of the street to die. Many pass him by without even a glance, but one man, a Samaritan, takes pity on him and bandages his wounds and brings him to an inn to take care of him (The New American Bible 1047). I knew I had to be her good Samaritan. I marched over and before he could hit her again, I stood in front of him and yelled, “Stop!”

He snarled at me and said, “Who are you? I am her brother, its fine.” I could not believe he was trying to justify his actions because the little girl was his sister. I didn’t even know how to reply. I ignored him and grasped the little girl’s hand and told her she could stay and play with Devin and me.

Sibling abuse is the physical, emotional or sexual abuse of a sibling to another. Sibling physical abuse can range from milder forms of aggression between siblings, such as pushing and shoving, to very violent behavior that can cause very serious injury (Sibling Abuse par. 1). To some parents, it may be hard to distinguish between normal sibling rivalry and sibling abuse. Often parents can be blind to the abuse that is actually occurring because they do not see it as a serious problem until serious harm occurs. Research shows that sibling abuse is actually quite common. Experts estimate that 3 children in 100 are dangerously violent toward a sibling (Sibling Abuse par. 5).

That day at the playground with the little girl was the first time I had witnessed abuse. My first hand experience of abuse dealt with sibling physical abuse, but there are many more forms of abuse. I did not know that abuse existed and that the little girl was one of many in the US who has suffered from abuse. There are over 3 million child abuse cases each year. Of those 3 million cases, it is estimated that there are about 5.8 million children abused each year because each case may include multiple children. The various types of abuse include physical, neglect, sexual, psychological, and medical neglect. (National Child Abuse Statistics par 1). In these abuse cases, 17.4% are reported to be physical abuse. The National Center on Child Abuse and Neglect defines child physical abuse as: "The physical injury or maltreatment of a child under the age of eighteen by a person who is responsible for the child's welfare under circumstances which indicate that the child's health or welfare is harmed or threatened” (Physical Abuse par 1). The little girl from the park was just one of the 870,000 of the children who are physically abused each year. With such shocking numbers, how did I not know that child abuse existed? Why was this exposure to abuse such a shock to me, which I still consider a great burden on my mind today?

I am from a very large Christian family. We go to mass every Sunday and many of our family friends are people we met through our church. Due to my parent’s upbringing and all the people we surround ourselves with, I was never exposed to any type of abuse. It was never a topic my parents discussed with me. I honestly never knew it existed until that day at the park. I didn’t know what was happening and was not sure of the way I was supposed to react in that type of situation.

I waited with the little girl until my mom’s soccer game was over. I knew my mom would make it all better. I grasped the little girl’s hand and we walked in unison, tears streaming down my eyes. It was such a relief to know that my mom was there to help. I explained to my mom how the little girl was pushed, kicked, and had sand shoved in her face. She told us it would all be okay and that we would find her mother. My mom’s words were soothing to me because she was able to take some of the burden I was carrying off my shoulders. I could not wait for the little girl’s mother to find out what her son did to her daughter. I was anticipating a punishment for this boy’s actions, so I would know that this boy would never lay hands upon her ever again. That was the comfort I was anticipating and it was a comfort I would never receive. Her mother finally came over, and she asked my mom what was going on. My mom told her everything that I told my mom, not leaving out any of the horrible details. To my great shock, the mother did not care the slightest bit, and it seemed as is if his actions towards her were of the norm. The mother looked at me and saw the loads of tears just pouring out of my eyes. She asked my mom, “Why is she crying?”
My mom answered, “Because she cares”.

The mother, daughter, and brother started walking away. The mother grabbed the daughter’s arms rather aggressively and the little girl was glancing back at me with desperate eyes. I still remember those green eyes looking so pitiful and just searching for hope. My mother held me and whispered in my ear, “You did all you could do. All you can do is pray and God will take care of her.”

The reason I never knew about abuse before then was because my parents sheltered me, not because they too were unaware. My father is a detective of Nassau County in the special victims unit, which is involved in the investigation of child physical and sexual abuse. With his multiple years of experience on the job, I wondered to myself as I was writing this paper why my dad never talked about these issues with me. As a child I would always ask him, “Daddy, what exactly do you do at your job?”

Every time he would answer, “I catch bad guys.” He would make an uneasy facial expression that gave me the feeling that he did not desire to discuss his work with me, which of course made me all the more curious. When I was a young girl in the 1990s, before cell phones came into fashion, I would call my dad’s work in order to talk to him. He would answer the phone saying, “Special Victim’s Unit, Detective Moran speaking.” I wondered who these “special victims” my dad was dealing with were. And why couldn’t I know more about it?

I gave my dad a call on the phone today and asked, “Dad, why didn’t you ever tell me anything about your job and what you deal with as a detective? And why did you and mom keep me sheltered from the reality of the world?”
He responded, “Becca, I deal with some very inhumane cases that are not fit for children to know about. All you needed to know was that I catch bad people. Your mother and I would not discuss these abuse cases with you because there was no need to. We would never allow you to be surrounded by such things.” My dad attempted to justify him and my mom not talking to me about abuse because it was not fit for children and that they would never have me exposed to it because they wouldn’t allow it. But in reality, I did witness abuse and it truly frightened me.

The rate of child abuse and child abuse fatalities has increased greatly since 1985 by a shocking 39%. Child Protective Services have confirmed that there are nearly 1,400 child abuse fatalities every year. That means there are nearly 4 children killed everyday in the US due to physical abuse or neglect (National Child Abuse Statistics par. 3). Lisa B. is a survivor of child physical abuse. She recalls her most dreadful memories of her mother screaming, “Stop! Stop! Stop! You’re gonna kill her!” (Lisa B. par 3). Her father would beat her mercilessly, even at the age of 17. The program called Childhelp got her through the toughest times of Lisa’s life. They were there when she had no one to turn to and they stayed on the phone with Lisa for hours and talked her out of killing herself one night. Since Lisa’s younger years, she has mothered a child and has worked most ardently to help abused children like herself. Lisa states, “I feel that there needs to be more public awareness about what actually happens to an abused child. Please help me get the word out there. Let’s get together and help our communities become more aware of this horrible problem” (Lisa B. par 7,8). I entirely agree with Lisa that there needs to be greater awareness of child abuse. Child abuse is a very serious issue and absolutely needs to be addressed. I think a good way to acknowledge this issue is by educating the future generation, which includes young children.

I know that children should not know all the gruesome violent details that are associated with abuse, but I would argue that parents should inform and discuss with their children about the abuse that exists in the world. Looking back on the situation, I wish I knew what was happening when I saw the little girl being beaten. Maybe I could have been spared a little bit of the initial shock that swept through my body during that April day. Parents should educate their children about abuse and also teach them how to react if they are ever a witness to abuse. Doing this will help children not to freeze up like I did. They will be more apt to react and help the situation, so that no farther harm is done and maybe an abused child will get the help they so desperately need.

Works Cited

"Lisa B. in Her Own Words | Childhelp." Prevention and Treatment of Child Abuse |
Childhelp. Web. 02 May 2011.
"National Child Abuse Statistics | Childhelp." Prevention and Treatment of Child Abuse |
Childhelp. Web. 17 Apr. 2011.
The New American Bible. New York: P.J. Kenedy, 1970. Print.
"Physical Abuse - Child Abuse: An Overview ~ FindCounseling.com." Find a Therapist
at FindCounseling.com, The Original Therapist Finder Search Engine, Formerly
TherapistFinder.net. Web. 02 May 2011.
"Sibling Abuse: Your Child." University of Michigan Health System. Web. 04 May 2011.